Bibliophile: The Metalmorph Manifesto

Concert at SAFI FAYE STAGE (HKW)

The Metalmorph Manifesto is the result of an ultimate cut-up based on a metal-mind-map inspired playlist, where all the farthest corners of the metal universe come together and morph into one. Think of it as the ultimate metal song textbook. It is inspired by all those magical metal mind maps already existing, from the ones that the big metal magazines add as a fold out poster in their special editions to the ones made by die-hard young metal nerds.

While spending a couple of cold gray fall nights scrutinizing all of the metal-mind-maps in existence together with grind god Piz Bonsai we naturally found fault with each and every one of them. What can you expect, when embarking on the never-ending quest for the ultimate metal-mind-map or family free. Things got even worse (or more challenging) when artist and curator Andreas Hachulla sent me an article published in Silence Magazin titled "Wirklich ALLE Metal-GENRES mit Beispielbands!" (Really ALL metal genres with example bands!). It is a list of 407 Metal genres compiled by blogger Alex, and the genres are off the chart... one even more obscure than the other; from Ocean metal, Raggacore, Simpsons Metal, Yiddish Folk Metal to Dungeon Synth and Buddhist Metal. Just try and include all significant sub-genres of heavy metal without excluding important bands. Like the critique we had on other metal-mind-maps, I’m sure others will heap criticism on ours. But that’s fine. That’s what makes metal so magical; our own interpretation and commitment to its culture.

So, the metal-mind-map used to create this here manifesto was made by Piz and me. Whereas I was responsible for the outlines and eventual whip-cracking, it was Piz who did most of the work, dragging his tired-ass and tinnitus damaged ears (all those years as grind god come with a price) through hours and hours of metal; from speed to glam, to poser to punk. It was Piz who came up with the ultimate metal playlist, accompanying our metal-mind-map. Later on the metal mind map was revisited and fine-tuned at Berlin's finest Blues bar Speiches in the company of Felix Knöppel. That night our metal-mind-map and playlist was finalized with some wild scratches of a big ballpoint pen. Half of which is hardly readable, and drenched in beer, reeking of cigarette smoke and metal- skull-cracking sweat. It was the start of countless discussions that night and a final conclusion: Alles = Rock (Everything = Rock).

Our metal mind map is not like your average mind map; it’s morphed... into a lyrics book. Good luck deciphering this one, you metalhead! The cut-up technique passed on to us by William Burroughs was applied to around 70 lyrics, from all kinds of metal genres. After C.U.M. (The Cut-Up Manifesto consisting of 27 artists’ manifestos from the past 100 years or so all morphed into one) be prepared now for the Metalmorph Manifesto, carefully dissected and rearranged by yours truly.

To put the Metalmorph Manifesto to the test, a band was formed consisting of Lula Valletta herself, Richard Lucius (Goshawk, Freddy Famous, Gibfum) and Felix Knöppel (Uranus Front, Lichtspucker). During a 20 to 30 minute performance the lyrics book comes to live. In typical dada fashion as well as the Metalmorph Manifesto itself, coincidence is vital; a band of professionals who let their music find it’s own way within the Metalmorph Manifesto realms. Word goes that after the first Metalmorph Manifesto performance a new genre of metal was born; Dadacore.

Disclaimer: the metal mind map seems never-ending and each one has a personal touch. We decided to exclude NSBM and Misanthropic Suicide BM due to it!s highly racist and nationalist content. We don’t want to give a platform to these kinds of ideologies, even if it means our metal- mind-map is not complete (which it never would be anyway)... Anal Cunt on the other hand did make it to the list due to their satirical take on grind and noise core; their entire modus operandi being to make the fastest, most brutal, and most offensive music humanly possible. With a few to the consistency and readability of the manifest, a couple of Nordic songs by Mortiis, Ulver and Dahmer were translated into English. A big thank you for this to t_apio and Torswin. The English/German Rammstein song is kept in its bi-lingual form. Speaking of Rammstein: however controversial they are nowadays (and maybe always were; its logo flirting with Wehrmacht’s cross logo) they are included for their importance to Neue Deutsche Härte (a genre I insisted on including) and also to emphasize the bias and controversy within the metal music genre. Metal is for all, unfortunately also for those with a narrow sided and wrong view on the world. It has its dark and deep corners, like most or all subcultures. But mostly for me, metal is more than distorted guitar riffs and chords, powerful smashing of drums, low-range bass and aggressive vocals. Metal is about voicing the minority; the disenfranchised on the margins of society speaking out on anti-establishment and protest.
- Lula Valletta